Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays from Marymount!

Walk-In Application Day Returns Like a Jedi on 12/2/11

Image from starwars.wikia.com. Property of Lucasfilm Ltd. 

Last year we had five Walk-In Application Days. At the onset I thought I'd be clever and compare each to the nearest major holiday. 


Why holidays? Because WIAD is a long tradition (like Thanksgiving Dinner), stressful (like Black Friday), and fun for the whole family (like Christmas Morning). 


That was fun for the first few, but I rapidly ran out of witty holiday metaphors (and also, incidentally, of the holidays themselves). So this year, rather than resorting to a hackneyed attempt at making a analogy to National Mutt Day on 12/2/11, I'm going to try something new (and equally hackneyed):


Movie Sequels 


And what better sequel to start us off than George Lucas's finest work, Star Wars Episode VI: Return of the Jedi?


So, here goes after the jump. 


...Please pardon my nerdiness.

Happy Thanksgiving From Marymount College!

The Eternal Question This Thanksgiving:

There comes a time where every man must ask:

“To brine, or not to brine, that is the question. Whether ‘tis nobler for the bird to get dunked in a liquid of immense salinity, or to take it into my arms and with a sea of butter, lovingly baste it. To brine, to dry out no more; and by brine we end the long history of moisture-sucking breast meat, the heartache of a bird sacrificed only to go uneaten. The flesh so moist: ‘tis a consumption devoutly to be devoured. To baste, to butter—to crisp and brown the skin—aye, with a spice rub. For in the basting, what flavor may come when I turn on the electric coil of my oven must give us pause—the respect of the in-laws to be earned. For we cannot bear the whips and scorn of the dinner guests for a bird cooked wrong, the poor cook’s pangs of dispriz’d dinner….”

Alas, poor Butterball, I’ll cook you well.

Experts Agree: Marymount Housing is More Awesome Than Soviet Bloc Apartments

Yeah, we're pretty proud of our Residential Life at Marymount. After all, you get a house—a fully-furnished two-or-three bedroom townhouse to be more specific. And we include utilities, food (from the same company that caters for the Getty Museum), parking, 24-hour gated security, and transportation. 

It's certainly better than some of the alternatives.


Learn more here, or check it out during our Fall Preview Day on November 19th! 

How To Get The Most Out Of Your College Search

http://dianasaurdishes.com/02/epic-turkey-pesto-sandwich/

Smell that in the air? It smells like recruitment season (and also, incidentally, a lot like the turkey sandwich I just had for lunch).

Unless you work in the admission office of a college, you probably don't call this time of year recruitment season. In fact, you probably don't call it anything—except maybe, "the time T.V. gets good again," "football season," or, logically, "fall."

Still, you're probably noticing slight changes in your daily routine. Your school is likely being invaded by hordes of peppy admission counselors (like yours truly), your AVID and AP English teachers are probably making you write your seventeenth draft of your personal statements, and your parents are surely starting to get that wide-eyed, "college-is-going-to-cost-what??!?" look.

It's like Christmas, without the presents.

The whole process can be a little daunting. After all, how are you expected to wade through the thousands of colleges out there to pick just one? And, even if you do choose one, how do you know for sure that it's the right fit, especially considering (if you're like the majority of high school seniors) that you're  not even entirely sure what you want to study yet?

We're here to help.

Undeniable Photo Evidence: Marymount College > An Ice Storm

The argument is finally over. Marymount College is more awesome than an ice storm. Check out other ways that we dominate HERE.

Orientation Schedule -- Just What You Always Wanted!

Attention! ¡Atención! Achtung! Faites attention! OBS! 注目！Внимание! Perhatian! الانتباه! 주의! 

New students! 

Read on for the schedule!

That is all.

Hey Techies, Do You Get The Shakes When Your iPhone Goes Dead?

Via: OnlineEducation.net

Thanks to OnlineEducation.net for an awesome infographic!

So...I find it odd that only 82% of students write their papers on a device. What else are they using? Papyrus?

What do you guys think? Is this spot on? Are you fiending for your Tablet?

There's More Panic About Housing Than When Fannie And Freddie Burst The Bubble

With our August 23rd and 24th move-in dates fast approaching, many of you are thinking about your upcoming stay in our Residential Communities, and that thinking has given rise to some pressing questions...

Dude, I Was At Testing Before It Was Cool...

Wayfarer Sunglasses, NBA Jam, Robert Downey Jr.—some things are so awesome that they simply must make a comeback. Take our testing and registration days: life a thief in the night they came and went. Those that caught the testing train were happy, secure, and ready to rock higher ed like a sampled techno beat. However, far too many were left untested, unregistered, and completely at the mercy of capricious "auto-scheduling."

Marymount College Memes! Create your own!

Absolute gem from new student Charlie W.

A meme—for those of you who aren't surgically connected to your computer's hard drive—is defined as: "an idea, behavior or style that spreads from person to person within a culture."

Within the wild west of the World Wide Web, memes are rampant. Think "Cute Kittens," "Dramatic Chipmunk," Old Spice commercials, "FAIL" and "WIN," "Demotivational Posters," Rebecca Black, etc.

(PS, Rebecca...why'd you sell out? I can't play your song on YouTube anymore and it has simply ruined my weekends.).

For fun, we made some Marymount-themed memes. We hope you enjoy. We also hope you do as Charlie W., one of our new students, did. He sent us the poster on the left, and it's quite possibly the best thing I've ever seen. 

(Warning, heavy lulz after the jump...)

Marymount 2.0 - Now With 300% More Awesome!

Summer is here. I think. It's hard to tell through the peanut-butter-consistency fog bank outside my window (for those of you not from southern California: every June it gets really foggy in the morning. It's called "June Gloom," and it is our karmic punishment for being able to get a tan in January).

Anyway, Marymount College is getting some work done this summer (like everyone else in LA), so we'll be in beach-body shape when our students return in the Fall. I'm stoked.

Read on after the jump to see all the changes we're making this summer...

We Asked Our Newly Admitted Students What They Liked About Marymount - This is What Some of Them Said...

Thanks, guys! The feeling is mutual!

Are you an admitted student? See what else they're saying by joining the Fall 2011 Admitted Student Group! 

Not admitted yet? Like our admission page and add your voice to the mix!

So, you've made the big commitment to us. [Yay!] ...Now what?

image from www.themodernjewler.com

The college admissions process is frighteningly like dating. You, the applicant, scope out some hot prospects to see what they have to offer. There are a lot to choose from. Some may be a bit of a reach, some may be below your personal standards, but when you're playing the admission field it doesn't serve to be too exclusive, right? [Besides, they should already know you're not looking for anything serious yet. It's way too early for that...]

Eventually, when you get a better feel for what's out there, you start "talking" to some of the most attractive prospects. You'll visit a few of them on admission dates. Some will scare you off (stage seven clinger!). Some will sweep your off your feet ("how would you like a scholarship?"). Once you're smitten with a school or two, you ask them out (or, more accurately, ask yourself in). If you're lucky, the feeling is mutual. They'll formally accept your advances and ask if you want to take it to the next level. Then comes the big decision:

Are you ready for serious commitment?

Marymount College Has Pre-Med!

I should have listened to my parents. "Go to med school," they said. "There is always demand for healthcare."
 

But I knew better, of course. So I went off and got a degree in creative writing. I wanted to learn critical thinking and analyze works by some of the greatest minds of all time. I wanted to create something that would be a lasting legacy. I wanted to avoid calculus at all costs.
 

I accomplished all of this, but the fact remains that in terms of remuneration (See, Dad? I did learn something in college), the ability to operate on a living brain beats out free-verse poetry nearly every time. After all, you rarely hear: "We need a writer, stat!" or "Is there a writer in the house?!" or "The timely intervention of the talented writer saved my life."
 

Still, though I will likely scrape by on a diet of ramen noodles and unfulfilled dreams for the rest of my life, I am very proud of my liberal arts background and feel that I received an education that ideally emphasized my strengths (And my parents are proud that at one point they saw me don a lab coat for an acting role, so everyone is at least somewhat happy). But, if only there had been some way to get both: a personalized education and a lucrative career saving people's lives—a way, essentially, to become Michael Crichton... 

The Final Walk-In Application Day - Friday the 13th!

"Wait," you say. "You're having another Walk-In Application Day?! Again? But the May 1st deadline has already passed..."

Yes it has. But just like Jason—and the entire series of Friday the 13th Movies—our Walk-In Application Days simply won't die. You think they're over, but when you aren't looking they rise again, lurking just around the corner, ready to assail you with smiles, campus tours, food, and offers of late admission (aren't we scary...).

Especially if you're a transfer student. 

We really like transfer students.

In fact, we like you so much that we're still giving away transfer scholarships to qualified students.

The May 1st National Reply Date is, uh, Sunday

"Sonic" Franchise is property of Nintendo via SEGA

I've developed a twitch in my left eye that kind of makes it look like I'm trying to flirt with Sonic the Hedgehog. All of us in the office have, to some extent. This is due both to near-lethal levels of caffeine consumption and—more tangibly—the looming May 1st deadline. In the admission world, these last few days of April are called interchangeably: "Crunch Time," "Ulcer Week," and "Divine Punishment." We're madly processing deposits, scheduling last-second interviews, explaining the multilevel mysteries of financial aid, and desperately trying to match floating SAT scores with the proper applications.

You, too, are probably stressed—unless you've already paid the commitment deposit to a school of your choice, in which case you're probably kicking back with a cold soda and planning the color scheme of your dorm room. If you're not one of those lucky deposited students, you're probably waking up every night in a cold sweat, having dreamed that you're sitting for yet another SAT session but can't concentrate because for some reason you forgot to wear pants. So, let's help each other out. Read on for some things you can do to make all of our lives easier. 

Attention International Students!

Some of our international soccer players. And Sarah.

Due to some nifty tracking software, we can see the geographic location of those who view this blog (don't worry...we won't start calling you with offers for long distance phone service), and we're delighted to see that we're developing a following all over the world. We're doubly delighted (especially Sarah, our Assistant Director of International Admission) because international admissions is one of our top priorities at Marymount. So, my global friends, we in the admission office wanted to let you know that we see you. We see you, Thailand. And you New Zealand. And the hundreds of you in Russia. And you chaps in the U.K., the E.U., and the U.A.E. We even see you, lone visitor from Panama, and to you we say Bienvenidos.

Do you want to come to school in California?

Read on after the jump for [un]official reasons that students from all over the world should check out Marymount College! 

Admitted Student Day Recap

Click to view the slideshow!

Well, Admitted Student Day is over and has faded into that soft, fuzzy place where all happy memories dwell. Our Director of Admission has stopped hyperventilating (for now), there is parking on campus again, and my prodigious sunburn from our Major and Student Involvement Fair has faded to a pastel rosiness.  It was one of our most successful Admitted Student Days ever. We had over 275 attendees from all over the country, and over thirty students made the decision to deposit for our fall class on the spot.  If you haven't deposited yet and would like to, contact us today!   A lucky few of those (pictured in the slide show above) were able to walk away with some snazzy Marymount Apparel (and one Ikea gift card good for at least a thousand Swedish meatballs...or a desk). Highlights of the day included a candid student-life discussion, a student-moderated faculty panel, and a presentation on our patented "Anti-Monster" job and internship placement program.  Our soccer tryouts on Saturday were also extremely successful, with more than twenty new players vying for a spot on the team! Great work, ladies and gents!  We had a blast, and we hope you did too. Hopefully we'll see you here in the fall, but in the meantime, make sure to join our Admitted Student Group and meet some of your future classmates, like our Admitted Student Page (and/or our Office of Admission Page), and join our twitter following! What was your favorite part of the day? Tell us below!

Admitted Student Day (April 15th), and "A Day in the Life of a Marymount Student" - Straight From the Students Themselves

I was a Marymount Student once upon a time, but it's been...a while. When I attended, Facebook was not nearly as cool as Myspace, "Yeah" by Usher and Lil' John was the top song on the radio, nobody had ever heard of an iPhone, and Justin Bieber was in 4th grade (isn't he still?).

Yes, kiddies, I'm old. 

Aside from being a depressing reminder that I am officially a "grown up," my graduation to the real world means that I am not the most up-to-date reference for what it is actually like to be a student at Marymount. Though my job gives me a pretty good "official" idea, dig a little deeper and I'm likely to start talking about archaic things like Playstation 2® and cargo shorts. So, instead, I'm going to leave it to the experts: our current students. 

This Friday, April 15th, we're hosting our Admitted Student Day. Specific details will follow at the end of this post (tease!), but the idea is that our admitted students will be offered the opportunity to see what it is actually like to attend Marymount. You can meet your prospective classmates, get to know our staff and faculty, and talk candidly with current Marymount students about their experience here. 

Read on after the jump to get the inside scoop about Student Life!

Marymount Athletics

Prior to working at Marymount, I have to admit that I was, at best, the quintessential American soccer fan. That is, I knew that soccer is a sport that most of the world enjoys. I knew that our friends across the pond have the sense to call it football (logical, seeing as how the sport, when boiled down to its key components, involves a foot and a ball). I had watched the World Cup, I had some idea of what a hooligan is, and I even thought I grasped some of the rules (i.e. when someone enacts a dive with the tension and dramatic flair of a Shakespearean tragedy, the ref holds up a colored card and much swearing ensues). Still, other than tepidly cheering on the US team every four years, I never really had much of an emotional connection to the sport. Until now. Now I have a team that I follow, and I believe that by any standards that officially makes me a soccer fan. I feel so...enlightened. 

Read on to learn more about Marymount College Athletics!

Marymount College is Proud to Announce Our New Ph.D. Program!

It has been an exciting few years at Marymount College. First, we added our dynamic Bachelor Degree programs. Then our soccer program was inducted into the NAIA (National Association of Intercollegiate Athletics). And now, most exciting of all, we are finally offering one of the most competitive, lucrative, and exciting doctorate programs in California!!!

For several years we have been investing large sums of money in a prestigious market research firm with the express intention of learning what the student demographic really wants from their education. We noticed a definite trend: in this economic downturn, students are interested in staying in school as long as humanly possible. Forever, if that's an option.

We've listened to the market, and, due to a very generous grant from the Punchinello-Bettis Foundation, we have developed a program that allows students to: 

• Earn six-figure salaries immediately upon graduation 
• Avoid the troubled job market for years without being unduly stressed by a too-demanding curriculum.
• Study classes as unique, special, and bold as students of the iGeneration consider themselves to be.
• Introduce themselves as "Doctor" and correct every telemarketer and restaurant host they encounter.

Read on after the break to learn about our new Ph.D. program! 

It's Friiiday, Friiiiday, Friiiiday [This Just In: Saturday Comes Next]!

Fun, fun, fun, fun, fun, fun (yeah!)--you know what fun is! Take some time this weekend to have some! Forget the important decisions, like whether to take the front seat or the back seat. Just kick back, relax, and "party" like a tone deaf 13 year-old.

Here's some good news to assuage your worries and ease your troubled mind into weekend mode: we haven't lost your application. If you haven't heard from us yet, it doesn't mean that something is wrong. We're still admitting for fall, we're still giving out financial aid, we're still accepting applications for housing. We have a record number of applications, and we're committed to making sure that each applicant gets the same careful consideration that we've always given in the past. It might take a little longer, but don't worry. You'll hear from us. We promise.

So, now you can breathe a big sigh of relief and start planning your weekend festivities. Read on after the jump for our top ten list of things to do in the Marymount (South Bay) area.

WIAD And The Kingdom of the Crystal Skulls Strikes Back (With Leprechauns) Pt. 4 - 3/18/11

Yep. We're having another Walk-In Application Day tomorrow, Friday March 18th. Yes, as usual I'm going to try to make it relate to this month's holiday, namely St. Patrick's Day. No, I don't know if I am going to succeed, but it was better than trying to tie it to the Ides of March (Et tu, Brute?). 

And here we go...

What is WIAD, you (who have not been reading this blog) ask? Well, it's a magical day. You can come in anytime from 9am to 5pm, with your completed application and required transcripts, and...um...a cadre of leprechauns [student workers] take you on a mystical tour of the verdant, emerald isle that we call Marymount College [it isn't really an island...but you can see one from here.]. When you get back, you can nibble some fairy cakes and sip on a cuppa while our counselors [uh, Druid Apostates? Cut me some slack here...] process your file faster than you can lilt, "Hearts, stars, and horseshoes, clovers and blue moons, pots of gold and rainbows, and a red balloon." 

Then, if you've got the luck of the Irish, St. Patrick [our not-quite beatified assistant dean of enrollment] might deliver the pot o' gold at the end of the admission rainbow: a same-day admission decision (whether or not she'll drive snakes from California afterward remains to be seen). If there's a double rainbow (all the way across the sky!), you might even get a double pot o' gold: a scholarship on top of your decision! Of course, we'll need your SAT/ACT scores for that.

Click here for detailed information on what you need to bring.

RSVP by commenting below or on our Facebook page and (as long as you didn't do it anonymously) we'll have a present waiting for you tomorrow! 



Check back next month as we bring back yet another WIAD and I try to find an obscure holiday that isn't Easter to which I can compare it. Any suggestions?

How You Can Benefit From Spring Travel (And Why My Sweater Is All Wet...)

He appears innocent, but you're looking at a tactical pee assassin.

My dog thinks I am an absent father. He is showing all the textbook signs of teenage rebellion--though last I checked human teens don't express their displeasure by relieving themselves on their dad's dry cleaning. I must admit that it's an effective form of inter-species communication, but I'm running out of sweaters...

And it's not just the dog.

The auto-mailer at Facebook seems to be worried that I've died. I keep getting emails asking passive-aggressive questions about why I haven't updated my page recently (I think after two weeks of inactivity they start "poking" your next of kin). The new message light on my office phone is flashing with the urgency of an S.O.S. beacon, my expired list of Outlook reminders is about the length of the fourth Twilight novel (and reads at a similar pace), and my email inbox is stuffed with more time-sensitive information than a government intelligence leak.

It must be travel season. 

Writing A Good Admission Essay - 10 Cliché and Ineffective Essay Topics That You Should Avoid At All Cost

There is a panic that afflicts many students when they sit down to write their college admission essay. The blank page mocks them. "Fill me," it taunts. "Cover my crisp white emptiness with a 250-750 word distillation of the value of your entire life. Be brilliant, or you'll be deep-frying frozen potatoes for the rest of your sorry existence." 

Under the hostile, reproving glare of their computer screen, the student's brain suddenly does its best Windows Vista® impression and years of valuable life experiences are replaced by a mental "blue screen" of despair. It becomes all too easy to rush it; just hammer away on the keyboard and hope that something worthwhile trickles out.

It usually doesn't. Instead, the essay almost always falls into one of the following categories and is lost forever in the  crumpled morass of wasted paper.

So, no matter how panicked you are, don't EVER use one of these topics. They will do you a disservice.  

And the Oscar Goes To...

I like movies. Well, most movies. OK, more like some movies (ever seen Darkness Falls? It's about the vengeful murdering spirit of the Tooth Fairy. It, uh, doesn't make my list.) But I digress.

In the spirit of remaining hip and cool and "up with currents events", I am doing a post based on the ostensibly "hip and cool" Academy Awards last night. No, I'm not going to talk about James Franco's apparent revival of his Pineapple Express role while "hosting" the ceremony. Nor will I discuss the use of a certain four letter word when describing the difficulty of an acceptance speech (though it probably is "really [thank god we're on time-delay] hard."). I'm not even going to effervesce about Scarlett Johansson (though I could at length.)

I am instead going to highlight a couple of our student films. Did they make it to the Oscars? No (snubbed by the Academy again...). But everyone starts somewhere, and our program is a fantastic point of Inception (see what I did there?). We offer small classes (<17 students per class on average), state of the art editing and film equipment (including a green screen studio), faculty with real working experience in the industry, internship programs, and the ability to start working on films right off the bat. In other words, it's awesome--whether you want to stay all four years in our intimate program, or transfer after two years (USC and Chapman are two of our top transfer destinations).

See the films after the jump. 

Service, Spiders, Green Thumbs, and Nuns, Or, As We Call It At Marymount: Tuesday

Have you ever seen a sow-bug killer spider? If you haven’t, click here. It’s important to have the image in your head—unless it’ll give you nightmares, in which case, refrain from clicking. (Too late? My bad...)

They’re the ugliest spiders I think I have ever seen (because I don’t live in Australia).

You're probably wondering at this point why I am writing about creepy red spiders with disproportionately large fangs.

In Honor of Spring Preview Day: The Top Ten Things To Preview Before You Commit

You definitely want to actually see a college before you enroll, which is why you should attend our Spring Preview Day tomorrow, Friday, 2/18! No, it isn't anything like Groundhog day, but it is going to be a soiree worthy of "Punxsutawney Phil" himself! We'll have student panels; campus and residence tours; breakfast and lunch; faculty presentations; alumni presentations; and, rumor has it, our director of admission is going to arrive in an egg!

It starts at 8:00am. Be there.

On another note...Don't you wish they had preview days for other areas of life? It could save a lot of grief. Read on for our top-ten list of things (other than a college) that you want to actually preview before you make a decision to commit. 

"Why Marymount ?" - Direct From Our Staff And Faculty

“Why your school” is a fantastic question, and one you should really ask in regards to any college you are considering. Why should I attend? Why is this institution in particular a shining beacon of academic excellence in the vast, murky ocean of educational mediocrity? 

You probably don’t have to ask it like that (though if you do, I will be delighted), but, like buying a car, you don’t want to get stuck with a lemon just because you didn't ask.

It’s our job to answer that question, and we answer it a lot. Every admission page, blog, brochure, pitch, tour, and video will have a section devoted to answering “Why” (usually, in a fit of originality, called “Why [insert school here]?”). We’re kind of obsessed with it. Toward the end of the recruitment season you’ll find us randomly bringing up school facts in polite conversation (“Yes, I’ll have the rib eye, medium-rare, and did you know we have the highest transfer acceptance rate in the western United States?”), shouting numerical statistics at joggers through our car windows, and muttering our list of majors in our sleep. We’re popular at dinner parties.

You can find our official answers to the “Big Question” on our website [also here and here]. They’ve been perfected over more than a half-century, and, as such, don’t really need to be re-typed on a blog. However, in an attempt to offer something new and unofficial (and get away from the tour script that is on auto-repeat in my head), we posed this very loaded question to our faculty and staff to get their honest reactions. There is a reason that we choose to work at Marymount (and it's not California’s staggeringly high unemployment rate)—we love this school. Hopefully offering a candid view of what makes this college special to us will help to answer your own "Why Marymount" question. At the very least it will be more entertaining than reading another list of admission statistics.

So, without further ado, here is what our staff and faculty had to say:

Awesome [Nerdy] Valentines!

Happy Valentine's Day from Marymount College! In the spirit of spreading the love, we decided to reblog a couple of awesome Mariner-themed Valentines via our Twitter friends @Oceana [they got them from the sorta-NSFW site "Street Carnage"]. Though they may not win you many romance points, they'll at least prove to your sweetheart that you're college educated (or a Discovery Channel junkie).

Single? Try THIS post.

The Return of the Son of Walk-In Application Day Pt. 3

So, if the last WIAD was metaphorically Christmas, I suppose—in keeping with the seasonal theme I never should have gone with—this one is analogous to Valentine’s Day.

How romantic.

Come in this Friday from 9am-5:30pm and our whole office will be your collective Valentine! We’ll cook a nice meal for you [snack table], our little cupids [student workers—but they won’t be wearing diapers or armed with archaic missile weaponry] will flit around and shower you with personal attention [tours of campus], and then our admission committee will potentially profess their collective love with a same day decision. We’ll even waive your $40 application fee--and we promise we won’t spend the whole weekend sulking if you don’t buy us something in return (though we do enjoy flowers, candy, and diamond jewelry).

Here’s what you’ll need to bring.

• Your completed application (if you filled it out online, you don’t have to bring it in. We’re all high-tech and 21^st century here).
• Official transcripts from every high school and college at which you’ve attempted coursework (even if you withdrew).
• SAT/ACT scores (Optional. Don’t bring them if you’re against being considered for thousands of dollars of free money. Otherwise, bring them. Can’t hurt.).
• Personal statement/Letter(s) of recommendation. (Optional, but again, it can’t hurt).

That’s it! You don’t have to RSVP (hence the “Walk-In” part of Walk-In Application Day).

Stayed tuned next month when I valiantly attempt to make our next WIAD (March 18^th) tie into St. Patrick’s day. Any ideas?

Stories That Make Us Love Our Jobs - Heritage College Ready Academy

A bus full of awesomeness, not unlike The Magic School Bus.

Much like a crackling campfire, the gray and white flecks of the foam board that lines my cubicle have something of a mesmerizing, hypnotic effect. I can stare at them, mind as blank as a lobotomized pigeon, for indefinite periods of time (usually first thing in the morning…and after lunch…and most all of Friday).

This morning, however, the foam-board spell was soundly broken when 42 students from Heritage College Ready Academy (located in urban South Los Angeles) visited our campus. Any campus visit—whether it’s one student or one-hundred—is awesome (and a great remedy for cubical-induced avian-lobotomy syndrome). This visit, however, was particularly awesome. Super-awesome, even.

The first half was pretty standard: a tour of campus and a question and answer session. But then we ushered them all into one of our conference rooms.

We knew something they didn’t...

Bored? Go Clubbing!

It is a sad day for me. With a bang in Wisconsin and a whimper in Pittsburgh, football is now officially over and the dreadful spring doldrums are upon us. Thousands and thousands and thousands of basketball and baseball games will be won, lost, and tied before the next touchdown is scored in the fall. Now, like many of you, I will be left to stare despondently at the television and try to dredge up some excitement that my favorite team is a mere fifteen games behind the division leader. Come May, you'll find me alone in a dark room watching the Golf Channel and hyperventilating into an empty Doritos™ bag.

But spring need not be agony, my friends. There is a solution.

Practice Safe Social Networking - 10 Tips for Thwarting Would-Be Facebook Stalkers

We’ve googled you.

We’ve perused your Facebook, too. We’re like a jealous ex. And yes, we do wonder why that girl from your gym keeps posting such flirtatious comments on all of your pictures. You, like, totally know she’s trying to make us jealous.

This is an age of exaggerated self-importance. Sure you can film a video on your phone, post it on a website, and make it accessible to virtually the entire planet (because of course they’ll want to see it). You can invite millions of people into your personal thoughts, your pictures, your memories, your dating life (just where I want to be…in someone else’s failed romance)—and there is no animated good judgment cricket sitting on your shoulder to gently remind you that all of humanity doesn’t need to read your free-verse love poetry. Like reanimating a dead corpse (a la Frankenstein) or making a sequel to Mean Girls (equally horrific): just because you can, it doesn’t mean you should.

Read on for 10 great tips on thwarting would-be Facebook stalkers! 

When Recommendations Attack! (The Worst Letter of Recommendation We've Ever Seen)

The "Seal" of Marymount College?

Some people are just mean—straight-up awful human beings.

It’s bad when you encounter this type of person at the grocery store. It’s worse still when they marry into your family. But perhaps the very worst way you can interact with these wretched creatures is by asking them to write your college letter of recommendation.

You can’t have known the deep hatred for you that has been burning like magma within these teachers and advisers, or you never would have gone within ten feet of them. You probably liked them. You probably assumed the feeling was mutual.

It wasn’t.

I’m sure it was all they could do to keep from giggling when they told you that they’d recommended you with the highest praise. And you, poor soul, had no reason to doubt their word. How surprised you’d be, then, if you knew that they had instead made a very compelling case to us that you ritualistically torture baby seals every Tuesday night, and provided convincing flowcharts that prove that you are the sole cause of global warming.

Read on for the worst letter we've ever received...

Preventing the College Break-Up: Three Questions to Ask Before You Commit to an Academic Relationship

You can always tell when students commit to the wrong college. It starts small. Vague feelings that they just don't feel the same way toward the school as they once did. It becomes hard for them to imagine a happy future together with their chosen institution. Their friends will try to convince them that it's just a phase (all but the bitter, angry friend who has been scorned by a bad college experience in the past). "You used to find the school so attractive," the friends will argue. "Remember the happy days when you first got your acceptance letter? It'll be like that again. It just takes patience."

But that day never comes, and the listless, demoralized students will begin to withdraw—inventing halfhearted reasons to avoid the college any chance they can get. They'll begin to spend hours alone on their computer, checking out other schools' admissions profiles on seedy college-ranking sites.

It goes downhill fairly quickly from there. 

Winner: Water Cooler Wednesday!

Thanks to everyone who posted comments, who emailed comments (not quite what we were looking for, but you sent some gold nonetheless), who thought about posting or emailing comments, and who never considered sending a comment but privately thought of a funny one anyway! As promised, here is the winner of our last water cooler Wednesday question:

Spring Semester is About to Begin! (Orientation Schedule)

Winter is over. 

Our campus will no longer be abandoned to fog, landscapers, and lonely admissions personnel. The locals can pack away the parkas and galoshes that have been so crucial in fending off the frigid 50 degree nights. There will be absolutely no need to check the weather for at least the next 364.2 days, as the divine plague of strange liquid will soon cease falling from the sky. Traffic will lighten considerably, and the Hollywood Elite will no longer have to watch their livelihood take a speedy ride down to PCH on the geographical slip-and-slide upon which they decided to build their palaces.

Rejoice, my So-Cal brethren! Springtime is here!

...Well, academically, at least.

Spring Orientation begins this weekend, and Spring classes begin next Wednesday! Read on for a full schedule! 

Personal Statement Urgent Care Clinic - Part 2

“Orchids, Pansies and daffodils are flowers that bear beautiful scents and make good arrangements. These, have taught me much about people how they are identically different yet still the same too. That they are special and beautiful. Learning, this has allowed me to progress forward with courage and dissidence.”

Above is an excerpt from a personal statement that one of our counselors received. Don’t let this be you! Read on for Part 2 of our Personal Statement Urgent Care Clinic.

Personal Statement Urgent Care Clinic - Part 1

What is a personal statement? It seems to mean different things to different people. To many, it’s a redundant pain in the application. To others, it’s a necessary explication of a full and vibrant life. For far too many, it seems, a “personal statement” is a status update on facebook.

Read on for Part 1 of our Personal Statement Urgent Care Clinic

Water Cooler Wednesday - Comment and Win!

The Question:

Which Celebrity is most in need of a college education? 

It's pretty simple: Respond to the question above with the wittiest/funniest/most insightful [and clean] response on our facebook page or on this post and be entered to win a Marymount backpack full of goodies. We'll pick some of our favorites and highlight them in an upcoming post.

Even better, if you "like" our facebook page, follow this blog and/or follow us on twitter, we'll automatically waive your application fee!

If you want a chance to win, make sure that you give us some way to contact you. Please don't post anything in bad taste. We know we're all adults here, but if it offends us, we'll delete it immediately.