The Ten Commandments of Nailing Your Final Exams

Once upon a time, I went to college. In that age of yore, Facebook was still restricted to ".edu" email addresses, the iPad didn’t exist, and people actually drove to Blockbuster if they wanted to rent a movie. Still, even in that backward era of limited technology and entertainment options, there were one or two things I would rather be doing than dutifully studying for my final exams. In fact, I could probably list several hundred. But—as the bleary-eyed graduate students working as TAs in my classes kept reminding me—exams were important. Vital, even, if I intended to ever earn a diploma and a handshake from the President of the College (which my parents insisted would be vital to my job prospects. They were correct.)

That being said, I was a firm believer then—as I remain now—that during college you learn as much outside of the classroom as you do sitting in a lecture hall. In an effort to limit the time developing a peptic ulcer as I attempted to memorize the order of succession in the Ming dynasty (less vital to my job prospects), while maximizing my, ahem, “in-person social networking” (actually quite vital), I decided to devise a way to study smarter, so I could play “effectively maintain a balanced array of co-curricular experiences” longer. 

So, harken and I shall bestow upon thee the Ten Commandments of Nailing Your Final Exams:

I.            Thou shall not wait until the night before thy test to begin studying.

I’ve broken this a million times and regretted it every time. Nothing is worse than cramming for fifteen straight hours before breaking down into a twitching ball of caffeine fueled panic when the first question on the test references something you forgot to cover.

The best way to follow this commandment is to actually do your reading when it is assigned (shocking, I know). That way, you know the information already. A few 15 minute refreshers will get you up to speed in the week before the test, and you can use the time you would otherwise spend sobbing into your Biology textbook doing something you actually enjoy.

II.            Know thy professor as thy knoweth thyself.

By knowing the person who creates and grades the test, you often will be able to predetermine a good portion of the content of the exam and study accordingly. Because profs are people too, they tend to have distinct personalities, preferences, and passions.

• Remember what topics seemed to light them up in class. You can bet they’ll include those. If an essay allows you to choose a topic, try to pick something the professor is passionate about. It will make them happy. Happy is good. 
• Think back to the subjects they hit hard or spent extra time illuminating. If your professor spent five weeks on something, they’re probably going to want to make sure you remember that information. 
• Finally, be very aware of their pet peeves (i.e. a professor that goes ballistic if the Post-Modern and Contemporary Eras of Yugoslavian literature are confused) and, uh, don’t do that. 

III.          Thou shall get enough sleep the night before the test.

If you’ve already broken commandment #1, pulling an all-nighter is a complete waste of time. Clinical study after clinical study has shown that your brain simply functions better after a full night of sleep. In fact, sleep deprivation has a remarkably similar effect on the brain to being drunk—and I do hope you wouldn’t attempt to get away with a FWI (Final While Intoxicated), because at that point you’re beyond my ability to help.

IV.         Thou shall eat something delicious before the test.

Food makes your brain work better. True story.

V.           Thou shalt not stress.

Yes, a final is a big deal, but even if you don’t feel well-prepared, try to relax. Panicking hampers memory recall (resulting in that lovely blank feeling you get when you stare at the first question); makes you more prone to overlook small details; and makes it harder to think logically and consistently. Do breathing exercises, mediation, work out, listen to Bob Ross painting videos—whatever it takes to walk into that class loose and lucid.

VI.         Thou shall properly budget thy test time. Especially if the test haveth a written portion.

Scan to see how long the test is, what each section entails (e.g. multiple choice, short answer, essay) and make sure you set aside enough time to give each section its due.

P.S. Give more time that you think is necessary to essay sections (at the very least you’ll be able to proofread and change stupid typos before your professor highlights them with the Red Pen of Judgment).

VII.        When thou art in doubt, thou shall trust thy snap judgments.

Malcolm Gladwell wrote a book titled Blink about your subconscious brain’s ability to make correct, instantaneous decisions in virtually any situation. He’s right. If you’re not sure, your first guess is usually the best guess. There is a reason you were drawn to it—your subconscious is giving your conscious mind a hint. Of course, first use wrong answer elimination and make sure it isn’t a trick question, but if you still don’t know the answer for sure: go with your gut.

But, what If you’re getting nothing—you’ve never seen this information before in your life?

I’ve been there. I once read the wrong text book for my senior year “Global Climate” G.E. Oops. If the worst happens, use your best deductive reasoning: 

• See if any of the surrounding questions are familiar and if they can give you contextual insight into your current question.
• Check if the question is answered in the prompt of a later question—my favorite test mistake.
• Use your existing knowledge of topics related to the question to make a logical best guess. For instance, you may not know what the eyes of Dr. T.J. Eckleberg thematically represent in the Great Gatsby, but if you know common themes in literature of that era, you’ll be on the right track. 

VIII.       Thou shall diagram written answers before thou begineth to write.

Caught in the throes of an in-class essay, it can be easy to get carried away in the moment and accidentally leave out one of the arguments that you wanted to work into your answer. Take 20 seconds to write down the main points you need to address to answer the question fully, as well as keywords or information that you know your professor will want to read (see commandment II), and then get writing. This will also help to give your essay a smoother “flow of ideas,” which your professor will appreciate.

IX.         Thou shall always double-check thy answers.

Leave a little time at the end of the test to go back and make sure you didn’t make any careless mistakes. Also see if questions at the end of the test (when your brain got into the test-taking groove) shed any light on questions with which you struggled at the beginning of the test.

X.           When thou art done, done thou shall be.

Go celebrate, and stop thinking about the test. It’s over. You gave it your best shot. Obsessing over isn’t going to help, and it will ruin the best part of college:

Having fun.